Does it ever feel like people are staring at you? Fucking creeps me out. I wouldn’t really mind if their intentions were clear though, do you find me extremely handsome or is there food on my face? TELL ME! I have the unfortunate ability of always catching people looking at me, I’d rather be able to juggle, juggling doesn’t entail looking into someones eyes as they peer into your soul and inject themselves into your childhood memories and leaving cum stains on everything. My self worth is heavily affected by what I assume people are thinking when they are silently judging me, and if their facial expressions are any indication, I’m an asshole, or their mother just died, I don’t know. I hate the food court more than walking in on an old lady undressing, it’s the super bowl of “Who does that guy think he is, he’s not better than me. Hey look, he just got a ketchup stain on his shirt, faggot.” Leave me alone! I’m just trying to shame eat this burger I didn’t want. I don’t want to maintain eye contact with you as I try to shove this whole soft shell taco in my mouth. Why do you insist on looking over as I regret up sizing my coke? Are you jealous that I don’t look as sad as you do yet? I can see you are already disappointed in your fat 4 year old but that’s not my fault, so stop looking at me like it is. Tell you what everyone, I’m going to get a face tattoo to justify your stares. I’m going to feel so much better about myself because I know why you’re staring, my bad decisions, and you will feel so much better about yourself because you may be a fuck up, but you’re not as bad as that jackass with the face tattoo. It’s a win-win, NOW GET OFF MY BALLZ!